cebii

when mothers let you down

I think that everyone wants to impress their mother - to have her approval. I know I did when my mom was still alive, and I still temper my decisions with her in mind.

My teens want to impress their bio moms. They want their bio mothers to love them and approve of them, just like everyone else. Unfortunately, these women usually aren't very capable or respectable, and they are usually less mature and responsible than their daughters.

As I mentioned in an earlier entry, my seventeen year old has decided to try to rebuild a relationship with her bio family. She knows that she will not be able to deal with all the anger roiled up inside her until she deals with her family. Bless her heart, she's alraedy worked past so much. Anyway, her mother missed K's court date. Her mother still has parental rights and has always come to court to catch up and see K. This kind of kicked K in the gut, but she steeled her spine and called her mom. They set up a time so K could see her mom and sisters. This was last night. We were going to meet at a local restaurant. We got there, had a seat and none of them were there yet. K checked her messages and found one from her 15 yo sister apologizing that they couldn't come because their mom had some mystery illness. The woman couldn't even call herself.

She probably has a lot of guilt - she let K get abused as a young child, then abandoned her to state care when K started fighting back against her stepfather. K had to parent her bio mom for years because she was addicted to prescription drugs. It just bites that K is ready to forgive and her mother still can't face it. It makes us sad and angry. Holly suggested to K that she call her younger sisters and invite them to a movie so she can at least see them, and we won't have to depend on the mother's health...

posted by cebii @ 6:48 AM